Indian Woman fakes being raped while out on bail for attempted murder

http://www.hindustantimes.com- A Moga woman’s story of her kidnapping from Chandigarh and dumping here after gangrape in a moving car has turned out to false. 
Gurveer Kaur (24)posed as victim to frame her boyfriend’s wife who had got her into prison on the accusation of attempted murder by poking with HIV-infected needles. A year ago, Gurveer and her boyfriend, Sunil Kumar, were charged with torturing Sunil’s wife to the extent of sometimes even poking her with unsterilised needles, which gave her HIV-AIDS. The target became blind because of the repeated assault and on Friday, doctors at the Post Graduate Institute of Medical Education and Research (PGIMER) in Chandigarh operated on her eyes.

I know there's some tough Indian names in there but just do what I do and turn them into regular names in your head. Gurveer Kaur (Geraldine?) and her boyfriend Sunil (Steve?) are ruthless. I mean first things first, whats up with the laws in India? You can just stab someone with AIDS, get arrested, and walk outta jail? When you let someone like Geraldine walk out of prison after torturing someone's wife, giving them AIDS, AND making them blind your gonna get a fake rape story 100 times out of a 100. You think Geraldine gives a fuck? Like she's gonna walk out of prison and do what, community service? Feed the homeless? I think not. Pretty much the only move left for Geraldine was to fake a rape story, get some pity from the jury (do they have those in India?) and walk free. Don't get me wrong rape is never funny, but fake rape is right?

PS
I dont know why but this story only made me think of this...

Starbucks Employee Vs. Dunkies Employees

Vs

Ah the classic lesser of two evils battle. On one hand you have the over excited, cracked out Starbucks employee, against the completely depressed heroin addicted dunkies employee. Personally I'll take the dunkies employee all day every day. When I get a coffee (which is every day) I don't need to hear "WELCOME TO STARBUCKS WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU TODAY!?" These mother fuckers must destroy expressos all day because every single one of them absolutely loves there job. And there is nothing worse than someone who loves there job, especially when you haven't even woke up yet. Now I'm not saying I love it when Dunkies employees practically spit in my face and ask "what do you want" but it absolutely beats the over zealous Starbucks employee.

Is there anything worse than running out of TP?

Dropped a missile today after crushing a large meatball sub. So I'm packin a lip doing my business (dips and dookies, spits and shits, pooping and packing whatever you'd like to call it) and I realize there's no toilet paper in my bathroom. Naturally this is my Mom's fault but now its my problem. Is there anything worse than getting off the toilet with full poopy butt (thanks Tom) and doing the waddle/shuffle to your TP stock? Now personally I pull my pants up but leave my ass hanging out, quite the visual I know. But I was talking to a couple of my buddies about this and we started arguing about how to handle this situation. The majority vote was to pull your pants all the way up and risk getting dump in your pants. Umm am I crazy or is that disgusting? I get it walking around with your shit filled butt crack hanging out isn't exactly the most chivalrous move but it no doubt beats getting shit in your pants. Your an adult, there should never be poop in your pants without legitimate reason. 

Meet the Bartimus

So pretty much everyone reading this blog are either my friends, random people who stumbled upon this, or a certain someone from a certain website I'd like to work for. Time for you guys who don't know me to meet the Bartimus. Thats me in the picture, photo bombing hard on two smokes. If there's one thing you need to know about the Bartimus its that I created the photo bomb. Don't believe me?

Trust me there's many more where that came from. Think thats my only look? Please...

I'll fall asleep right in your eye ball and not think twice about it. I think I might be narcoleptic, I can fall asleep anywhere anytime. I once fall asleep standing up. Oh and chicks you think your safe if you take a pic with me...think again...

I don't know how more girls don't look like this in those pictures...

JK bitches love me...

Okay enough with the photo gallery I think you guys get it. I'm a narcoleptic, photo-bombing, semi-rapist ladies man who rages. Nice to meet you too, internet. 

I Called in sick on MLK day

So I called in sick on MLK day and my boss wasn't too happy about it cause I'm not "black". Whatev's faked sick went to the doctors and got a note. Can't touch me now bitch. Doctor's notes are my ace in the hole. No one, and I repeat NO ONE fakes sick like me. Ferris Bueller ain't got shit on me. Coughing all over the place, boogers and snot everywhere, drop the word diarrhea if I have to, think I give a shit (see what I did there)? Faking sick and getting work/school off is my gift in life. If there was an olympic event for it well...I'd fake sick and wouldn't even show up like you read about. I have a great fake sick system in place, never twice in the same month, and NEVER I repeat NEVER leave the house. Order some pizza and crush some movies on demand. 

PS

My emergency family member game is just as hot. Columbus Day and I have to work? Nah my sister's in the hospital. Oh you need me to work on my birthday? Sorry my Dad had another heart attack. 

Putin Trying to ban the Gay

MOSCOW (AP) -- Kissing his boyfriend during a protest in front of Russia's parliament earned Pavel Samburov 30 hours of detention and the equivalent of a $16 fine on a charge of "hooliganism." But if a bill that comes up for a first vote later this month becomes law, such a public kiss could be defined as illegal "homosexual propaganda" and bring a fine of up to $16,000.

The legislation being pushed by the Kremlin and the Russian Orthodox Church would make it illegal nationwide to provide minors with information that is defined as "propaganda of sodomy, lesbianism, bisexuality and transgenderism." It includes a ban on holding public events that promote gay rights. St. Petersburg and a number of other Russian cities already have similar laws on their books.

The bill is part of an effort to promote traditional Russian values as opposed to Western liberalism, which the Kremlin and church see as corrupting Russian youth and by extension contributing to a wave of protest against President Vladimir Putin's rule.

Samburov describes the anti-gay bill as part of a Kremlin crackdown on minorities of any kind - political and religious as well as sexual - designed to divert public attention from growing discontent with Putin's rule.

The lanky and longhaired Samburov is the founder of the Rainbow Association, which unites gay activists throughout Russia. The gay rights group has joined anti-Putin marches in Moscow over the past year, its rainbow flag waving along with those of other opposition groups.

Sooooooo in the mismatch of the century we have the "Rainbow Association" Vs. Putin. Ummmm I don't wanna offend any gays here but you literally stand no chance. I don't even think Putin allows rainbows in Russia. I'm pretty sure no one from Russia has even seen a rainbow, and if they have Putin probably had them murdered. There are three things that are certain in life, death, taxes, and Vladimir Putin will NEVER lose anything against something called the rainbow association. If your gay and you live in Russia, well you probably shouldn't be gay...or live in Russia. 

Fox News Reporter drops N bomb on Live TV

Haha! Talk about your all time back fires. I mean theres really no coming back from this. Two black anchors, our first black president's big inig- inaugural speech and you drop a hard N right in everybody's face on national TV? I mean there's choking and then there's this. I'm sure it wasn't intentional though. Everyone's got that one black friend that every time they come around you have to remind your self "Okay, do NOT say sup nigga!"